The Brilliance of Micro-Steps
Does it feel like life has been particularly heavy for many people this summer?
There have been countless hard stories of loss and displacement—at a time when many of us anticipate a bit of summertime reprieve.
A number of years ago, I faced my own challenging, uphill season that began—of course—right at the start of summer.
I was a newly single mom, living with a chronic, painful injury, arriving in a new community with grief-stricken children.
I know many of you can relate to this level of challenge, whether personally or through the stories of the people you serve.
I’d like to share a few thoughts from that season—both to help you navigate your own valleys and to strengthen the way you walk alongside others through theirs.
1. Pain is real.
Some would have you believe that emotional pain is an illusion. It isn’t. It’s part of life. Resisting that truth doesn’t make pain disappear. Denying pain is like sweeping dirt under a carpet—it just stays there, waiting.
2. Don’t get stuck in it.
Focusing solely on pain doesn’t make it go away either. It’s tempting to slip into self-pity. When I notice that happening in myself, it’s a cue to connect with a friend, get outside, or do something that lifts my perspective. Creating small, meaningful distractions helps lighten the load.
3. Focus forward.
Direct your time, attention, and resources toward the life you want to grow into. One strategy that helped me through especially hard days was returning to a quote, verse, or mantra that reminded me of my values. Mine was simple: “I will be Phoenix!”—a phrase that called me back to courage and action.
4. Take micro-steps.
What’s a micro-step? Small, manageable actions you take each day that add up and eventually compound into something much bigger.
One visible example for me is my garden. When I bought my home, it was a “fixer-upper.” The front yard was a tangle of gravel, junipers, dead cedars, and quack grass. Each year, I removed one or two unwanted elements and added one or two beautiful ones—each requiring countless micro-steps.
I remember one day especially well: my new neighbours came over with their equipment to help me pull out the dead cedars. What felt impossible on my own became an afternoon of laughter, teamwork, and the start of genuine friendships.
Today, my garden stops people in their tracks. From my office window, I see them pause to admire the blooms. What once felt overwhelming has become life-giving, built entirely from small, sometimes seemingly insignificant steps.
The same principle works for relationships, work, or life as a whole. Even when pain feels intense, you can shape something beautiful from it—one micro-step at a time.
But please don’t think navigating pain is a solo venture.
There were so many people who helped me when things were messy and painful. As Brené Brown’s research reminds us, we are wired for connection. It’s in those connections that we find hope, resilience, and healing.
If you’d like to explore how creative, practical micro-steps could move you toward your next chapter, I’d love to connect. This fall, I’m offering several transformational workshops, including Rising Strong™ Through VUCA and Dare to Lead™—details are here on my website.
One-on-one coaching is always an option too.
Alana
